How can you put it into words?
You’re not even sure whether you can identify the problems in your relationship.
How are you going to explain it to someone else?
Or maybe you can identify problematic behaviors or incidents – but the origin of the problem always remains just out of reach.
The dynamic between couples is always greater than the sum of the two people involved in the relationship. That dynamic makes it difficult to identify the actual issue, and eventually, the buildup of resentment compounds the problem. And examining problems is scary.
In fact, it’s terrifying. What if the problem is far worse than you thought?
You can’t stop catastrophizing. Lately, it’s difficult not to jump to the worst-case scenario.
It’s easier to practice avoidance and excuses.
My partner would never go to therapy.
uWill counseling make our problems worse?
But you are increasingly unable to ignore the facts: the problems are getting worse, anyway.
What if you can’t – or don’t want to – change?
Or perhaps you’ve realized that part of the issue is with you, but you’re still holding out?
Then, at least, you’re honest and insightful – and off to a great start.
Many “problem” behaviors, including grey-area substance use, addiction, impulsive spending, engaging in distracting emotional or sexual relationships, are not the actual problem.
At their core, they’re a way to cope with something else. Sometimes, that something else is a complete surprise.
Embrace the fear – so you can get back to embracing each other.
Let me help.
Together, we’ll examine behaviours and choices in the context of family and individual histories.
Reach out today at (415) 858-9454 for your complimentary 20-minute phone consultation.
I get it. Getting to the bottom of complicated relationship issues is scary, but it’s possible.
And it’s also worth it – because you two – and what you have – are worth it.